Stern taxes on the way
By John Dickinson on 9th Nov 06
WILL take it as read that you have all noted the political and media frenzy following the release of a document known as the Stern Report all 600 odd pages of it.
It has been interpreted as signifying The End Of The World As We Know It and that truly terrifying political and financial meltdown on a global scale is inevitable – unless we all stop riding two-strokes, or taking our kids to school in 4 x 4s...
Now, I don't claim to be an expert on World climate and on that front I actually share equal billing with Sir Nicholas Stern, the author of said report, because neither is he. Mr Stern is, I understand, an economist. And as economists rely almost exclusively on statistics in order to form their opinions I'm sure you will understand my reluctance in accepting his conclusions as gospel. Because you know what they say about statistics. You can make them 'prove' whatever you like and interpret them as you will.
Our politicians, on the other hand, had no problem whatsoever in accepting Mr Stern's report as 100% incontrovertible truth and that (Hear! Hear!) indeed we will all die in a hellish drought (or was it flood, they appear to confuse the terms) of our own makings unless we are all taxed until our very pips squeak. Oh yes, that nice, prudent Mr Brown could barely contain his glee at the thought of all those extra billions to be had from us 'bad' people who insist on riding, driving, flying, brewing tea, cooking meals, going to work etc, etc.
This was just pure, undiluted political bandwagoning on an obscene scale. I have yet to see an explanation as to what purpose the extra billions in tax are to be put – but we have our suspicions.
If the politicians were really as serious as they would have us believe about the gravity of the situation it is in their hands to actually do something about it. If driving four by fours is killing the earth then stop building them and stop selling them. If jet air travel is filling the air with pollutants that will bring about the rapid end of us all then ban air travel. Right now. No more flights after midnight. Ever.
Of course this is not going to happen.
But it won't stop Tony and Gordon and Dave and all the other huffing, puffing grandstanders taking the opportunity to wallop us with a hefty round of 'green' taxes. What hypocrites. They talk of bringing about the end of cheap air travel, for our own good. There's no pollution problem with expensive air travel then?
What they will do is to pose and posture and make a big noise out of making a few punitive gestures – such as making us all ride expensive four-strokes in competition instead of simple and cheap two-strokes. Can anyone actually imagine the infinitesimal difference it will make to world pollution by stopping the burning of the few gallons of two-stroke oil used in motorcycles on a Sunday – even on a worldwide scale? A jet passenger plane can burn eight TONS of fuel an hour. And how many thousand jets are airborne as you read this? Do I feel guilty burning through a gallon of premix on my two-stroke? What do you think.
We all know that governments will come down hard on motoring and motor sports in order to promote their 'green' platforms. Race promoters are actually doing their bit to try and appear 'green' themselves. How ludicrous is it that even the Formula 1 circus, with all its excesses, is to cut a few litres of fuel per car for next year's races. MotoGP has also cut the fuel allowance per race.
So 20 MotoGP bikes and F1 cars will consume a litre each less per race next year. That'll save the world then. I do however applaud the racing authorities at playing the politicians at their own game. Am I the only one who thinks that it really doesn't matter how much juice Valentino Rossi burns through in a weekend – I am actually a lot more concerned about how much fuel 1000,000,000 (yes, that's one thousand million) Chinese are planning on soaking up, and the 936,000,000 strong population of India, etc, etc.
All I ask is that you bear the above in mind when we few thousand off-roading Brits are picked out for special treatment when the inevitable round of 'green' taxes are announced. For our own good, of course.